People Don’t Fall Out of Love, They Fall Out of Practice

People often say, “We just fell out of love,” as if love quietly packed up and slipped out the back door one day. But in reality, most couples don’t fall out of love, they fall out of practice.

Marriage isn’t something that dies suddenly. It fades slowly when the small, intentional acts that once kept it alive start to disappear. The flirting, the curiosity, the shared laughter, the check-ins, the affection are daily habits that love is built on.

When we first fall in love, we put in the effort without even realizing it. We ask questions, we pay attention, we look for ways to make our partner feel seen. Over time, routines and responsibilities start to take over, and it’s easy to forget that love is a verb, not a feeling.

When you’re married, love is something you do.
It’s how you greet each other after a long day.
It’s taking time to listen instead of assuming.
It’s reaching out for a hand, even when things feel tense.

And yes, it’s keeping the spark alive.
Stop acting like flirting is only for first dates. If you’re not bringing the spark, don’t be surprised when it burns out. A playful text, a quick kiss in passing, or a small compliment can remind your partner that they’re still wanted, still chosen.

Keeping a marriage alive doesn’t mean grand gestures or perfection. It means returning, again and again, to the simple, intentional practices that build connection. When you treat love like something you tend to, it grows.

Don’t wait for it to happen, make it happen.