The 8 Types of Attraction You Might Not Know About
When people think about attraction, most immediately think about looks or physical chemistry. That’s only one piece of the puzzle. There are actually eight types of attraction, and understanding them can help you see your relationships more clearly and build deeper connections.
Physical Attraction – Being drawn to someone’s appearance, body language, or touch.
Emotional Attraction – Feeling connected on a heart level, like you can really share with them.
Intellectual Attraction – Being drawn to someone’s mind, ideas, or the way they think.
Spiritual Attraction – Feeling aligned through values, beliefs, or life purpose.
Experiential Attraction – Enjoying shared activities, adventures, or just spending time together.
Creative Attraction – Admiring someone’s talents, imagination, or how they express themselves.
Sensual Attraction – Wanting physical closeness and touch, not necessarily sexual.
Romantic Attraction – Wanting romance, emotional intimacy, or partnership with someone.
The truth is, attraction is more than just “hot or not.” Most strong, lasting relationships have several of these types working together. You have so much to offer!
You’re Not in The Mood?
You’re not in the mood?
You’re not in the mood? or you’re not in the mood for what you know you’re going to get? And if you’re not in the mood for what you know you’re going to get, then how come you’re not telling him what you want?
Telepathy isn't foreplay, babe.
If you want it, say it.
If you crave it, own it.
This blog is your reminder: don't just lie back and hope for fireworks. You light the damn match.
Thanks to queen Esther Perel for always giving us the language to take control of our sex lives.
The Power of Friendship in Marriage
The Power of Friendship in Marriage
When couples come into my office, they often say they want to work on communication, rebuild trust, or get the spark back. Those things matter, but underneath them all, there’s usually something deeper that needs attention: friendship.
Drs. John and Julie Gottman, who’ve spent decades studying what makes relationships work, describe friendship as the foundation of a healthy marriage. It’s what helps couples stay connected, even when life feels busy or stressful.
In the Gottman approach, friendship means knowing your partner’s inner world, including their hopes, fears, memories, and dreams. It’s being interested in who they are and turning toward them in everyday moments, not just the big ones.
What Friendship Looks Like in a Marriage
Staying curious about each other’s lives, even after years together
Expressing appreciation and affection regularly
Responding to small bids for connection (a comment, a sigh, a touch)
Choosing kindness, even when you’re frustrated
When friendship is strong, couples have a softer place to land during conflict. They argue differently—with more respect and less defensiveness—because underneath the stress, there’s trust and goodwill.
A Few Ways to Strengthen Friendship
Ask your partner about something small that matters to them today
Look for moments to say “thank you” or “I appreciate you”
Spend time together doing something simple that feels good for both of you
Keep learning who your partner is, even after years of being together
As the Gottmans say, “Happy marriages are based on a deep friendship.”
People Don’t Fall Out of Love, They Fall Out of Practice
People Don’t Fall Out of Love
People often say, “We just fell out of love,” as if love quietly packed up and slipped out the back door one day. But in reality, most couples don’t fall out of love, they fall out of practice.
Marriage isn’t something that dies suddenly. It fades slowly when the small, intentional acts that once kept it alive start to disappear. The flirting, the curiosity, the shared laughter, the check-ins, the affection are daily habits that love is built on.
When we first fall in love, we put in the effort without even realizing it. We ask questions, we pay attention, we look for ways to make our partner feel seen. Over time, routines and responsibilities start to take over, and it’s easy to forget that love is a verb, not a feeling.
When you’re married, love is something you do.
It’s how you greet each other after a long day.
It’s taking time to listen instead of assuming.
It’s reaching out for a hand, even when things feel tense.
And yes, it’s keeping the spark alive.
Stop acting like flirting is only for first dates. If you’re not bringing the spark, don’t be surprised when it burns out. A playful text, a quick kiss in passing, or a small compliment can remind your partner that they’re still wanted, still chosen.
Keeping a marriage alive doesn’t mean grand gestures or perfection. It means returning, again and again, to the simple, intentional practices that build connection. When you treat love like something you tend to, it grows.
Don’t wait for it to happen, make it happen.